n. Pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others.
This past week at Kindermusick should have been our best ever. The girls didn't cry in fear when it was their turn to be sung hello to. They even communicated the action they wanted, even if I had to translate. When it came time to go to "leaping land" they actually grasped the hands of the people next to them with nary a whimper. As we walked in a circle, I basked in the smiles of the other moms. The smiles may have been a wee condescending but I will take it considering the previous times we have had. So yes, it was close to the best class ever.
But it wasn't my best day at Kindermusik, not by a long shot. See that happened weeks ago when not one, but TWO kids had to be removed because of the absolute fits they threw. It was truly sublime. I know it is awful of me to take pleasure in another parent's misery. But what can I say, I am a schadenfreude mom.
It all started when I began taking the girls out in public. To be a twin mom is to instantly attract attention. And that is doubled when you are a mom like me, who often forgets snacks or to be more honest, a diaper bag all together. People were always nice but I got a lot pitying glances and "i don't know how you do its".
Now that I have what some might call "spirited children" I am always that mom. It's true. I can often be found carrying one child barrel style while frantically searching for the other one. We have almost been kicked put of the library at least three times. And yep, that's my girl Calamity Jane hanging from the monkey bars cackling gleefully in the face of imminent death while I try persuade her sister to come down the slide and stop holding up the line.
All in all, I have come to embrace it. Having gotten over the worry of what people think a long time ago (yep that was me breastfeeding my baby at a bar while drinking a margarita), I am usually able to shrug off any glances or dirty looks and enjoy my kids. When all three of us make it to the end of the day in one piece, I consider it a success.
But that doesn't mean I don't take a little pleasure when someone else is that mom. I will be the first to lend a helping hand, especially since you just gave me the day off.